I’m Going to Miss Saturdays

This is it. I’m going to miss my Saturday mornings with you. The slight panic each time I pressed send.

I'm filled with gratitude for each of you who read and commented on my weekly chapters. This is my first foray into the writerly world, and your thoughtful comments and loyal readership turned what began as an uncertain venture into something truly encouraging. What started as a quiet voice sent into the digital universe of Substack found, through you, a purpose. Thank you for joining me on this journey.

The book is dedicated to my children—two remarkable individuals in their early thirties, adopted as infants from Poland. Raised in Montreal, they grew up steeped in the rich legacy of their paternal grandparents, pillars of the Jewish community. They saw their maternal grandparents only occasionally—two or three times a year—and had little exposure to their Polish heritage beyond opłatek at Christmas. This book began as a modest endeavour to fill in some of the blanks.

My project evolved as I sought to understand the era, place, and war that shaped my father’s, and later my mother’s early years. It culminated in the realization that I wanted my children to know they descend from a strong, determined, and resilient people and nation—a legacy embedded in their DNA. I hope their grandparents’ lives will inspire them, connecting them to their roots and the remarkable story of their heritage.

By seeing history through my parents’ eyes, my intention is not to diminish other stories or the bigger picture or to claim they suffered uniquely. To the contrary, what strikes me is how no Polish citizen escaped the crimes of the Nazi regime during the Second World War. Every Polish family carries some version of this wound. As right-wing extremism and authoritarianism surge globally at levels unseen since the 1930s, their story sounds less like history and more like a warning.

Today, as hate spreads through social media like a virus—fringe ideologies, conspiracy theories, ultranationalism, racism, antisemitism, strongman worship, old poisons in new bottles—I find myself returning to how ordinary people faced down darkness before. My parents' generation didn't have grand strategies. They had small, daily acts of defiance. In their stubborn resilience, I see a map for these uncertain times.

I owe my deep gratitude to my husband, Jonathan, who has provided support and encouragement for every idea and project I have ever pursued (and that’s a lot of projects!). I appreciate that he always listens.

One day stands out in my memory: I had spent hours that day reading a large portion of Ulrich Herbert's book on forced labour and had a moment of realization that I had found my mother’s story. Late that evening, as Jonathan drove home to Montreal from a meeting in Ottawa, I recounted what I had read over the speakerphone for the entire two-hour journey. I barely paused, continuing even as he walked through our front door. He kept on listening.  

I wish to acknowledge Dr. Richard C. Lukas, whose seminal history books in English on Poland during the Second World War were the first I consulted when I realized how little Polish history I knew. Dr. Lukas graciously responded to some of my original questions, which encouraged me to write this book. I extend heartfelt thanks to historian Dr. Tomasz Frydel for his invaluable guidance, particularly in shaping the historical aspects of this manuscript and my parents’ stories. His expertise has been instrumental in ensuring the accuracy of the historical narrative. Special appreciation goes to Lauren Fedewa at the University of Toronto, who provided valuable insights and thoughtful commentary on women in forced labour. These historians have enriched the overall quality of this work. I extend my thanks to all the authors and historians who have helped me comprehend the events that unfolded in Poland between 1939 and 1945, as well as the post-war period. Their collective wisdom has been indispensable in crafting what I hope is a nuanced account. Any inaccuracies in historical detail are solely my responsibility.

My lifelong good friend, Elisabeth Châtillon, read all the drafts of my book and offered much-appreciated encouragement and probing, constructive input. I appreciate all my friends and family who asked how the book was coming along.

I was privileged to work with Claire Rothman and Bryan Demchinsky, writers and great editors, and now friends who provided mentorship and support at different stages of my project.

And to my parents: if I could, I would say to them that on most days, I feel like the apple did not fall far from the tree, and for that, I am grateful.

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Grabowski, Jan and Engelking, Barbara (editors). Night Without End: The Fate of Jews in German-occupied Poland. Indiana University Press, 2022.

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Forced Labor 1939-1945: Memory and History. "Digital Archive."  https://www.zwangsarbeit-archiv.de/en/index.html